


year 2000 and late

by PooPyon



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-05-31 07:24:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6461170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PooPyon/pseuds/PooPyon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s simple,” said Jason, “I think I just time-travelled my ass to the past.”</p><p>or:</p><p>Jason found himself in Bludhaven, a year after his death, with a completely clueless Dick.</p>
            </blockquote>





	year 2000 and late

“Ouf. Jeez,” Jason said, getting up as he rubbed his side and bum. A quick patdown revealed that nothing was broken. He looked around. “Where the fuck am I?”

“Bludhaven.”

He wasn’t really expecting a reply – it was one of those loud musings he liked to do to get a better grip of reality – but hey, an answer was appreciated nevertheless. Jason turned, hands grabbing the guns strapped on his thighs. Never too safe to be careful and all that.

“Whoa there,” the figure raised their hands. “Relax. I’m Nightwing, and you should probably keep those things tucked in.” Then, after a beat: “Did that rhyme?”

Oh, _great_. It’s the _boy scout_.

Jasons cocked his head to the side and half grinned. “Huh. Guess you figured out spandex makes your ass look prettier than those monkey suits eh, Grayson?”

“What?”

“It’s ridiculous what they made you wear – do they even have _pockets_? I knew you were going to go back to good ol’ domino mask though; you were always _such_ a showoff— Uh. You know those things are blunt, right?”

Nightwing had pointed his sticks right at Jason’s face, eyes narrowing dangerously.

“How do you know my name?” he asked quietly.

Jason blinked.

“You kidding, right?” Jason said, though his mind was already racing with _memory wipe brainwash not-Dick-Grayson controlled puppet humanoid robot alternate universe—_

“No,” the Nightwing-that-was-not-Dick-Grayson-question-mark replied. “ _Who are you?_ ”

Oh, boy. This can’t be good.

\---

“I’m Jason. Jason _Todd._ Red Hood? Come on, Dickiebird, the last time we met we had a family reunion over dinner, remember – though can’t say I’m a big fan of the entrée — _Seriously?_ ” Jason caught the puzzled look on Nightwing’s face and tried again, “Big plates with our literal fucking face on ‘em? Bruce and Joker inflicting emotional trauma on us? Granted, that’s not the first time they’ve done that, but –“

“Jason Todd?”

“So you _do_ have a brain—“

“Jason Todd’s dead.”

A frustrated grunt. “Thanks for the reminder, I got the note.” Jason sighed. “Look, it’s obvious that someone tampered with your memory—your mind, or psyche or whatever—so it’s probably best if you contact Big B and get that sorted out,” he said, already reaching for his grappling gun. “ _Love_ to stick around, but the Bat and I aren’t on speaking terms right now, so… Bye.”

He shoots his grappling gun to the nearest building, but Nightwing was immediately upon him before he could make a suave exit, arms and legs holding him back.

“What the _fuck_ , Grayson?”

“Sorry, but you and I need to have some serious, brotherly talk tonight.”

\---

Jason Todd was seated on a (pointedly uncomfortable) chair, arms and legs bound by crude ropes. The knots were solid, but Jason knew that if he felt like it, he could easily wiggle out in under a minute. To the courtesy of his _kind host_ , though, Jason had decided to stay put and play along; it wasn’t like Dick fucking Grayson is going to touch a strand of his hair, let alone pose a threat on him.

“So,” Dick started, voice a little too quiet for someone who usually finds it impossible to shut his hole during combat. “You’re Jason Todd.”

“Last time I checked, yeah.”

“The Jason Todd who was Batman’s partner, Robin? Who got killed by the Joker in Ethiopia? _That_ Jason Todd?”

“That’s all you remember from me, Dick?” Jason gave a mock sigh. “What about my _great_ personality and charming sense of humor? Oh, and the guns. Can’t forget about the guns. You’re not too happy about those, the last time we met. Or were you just nagging about the body count? Don’t remember.”

Dick frowned. Jason smirked.

“This is a sick a joke,” Dick declared. “I don’t know who you are or what your purpose, but pretending to be a _kid_ who _died_ on the line of duty _isn’t_ funny. Especially not when you’re _an adult_ – who are you trying to fool? Jason is – _was_ – sixteen. You’re at least my age. What’s your _game_ here?” he said forcefully.

“Wait a minute,” Jason said. “Back it up. How old are _you_?”

“Twenty.”

“ _Fuck_.”

\---

Jason took a deep breath. “Okay, first up: what kind of night cream do you _use_ , Dick? You barely change at all in four years. Secondly: you mind getting me out of these? It’s a little demeaning,” he said, gesturing at the ropes. “Or, you know, _don’t._ I got it.” He tugged at the last knot and broke free of his constraints. “Second week at the cave was Houdini we—“

“Houdini week, yeah,” Dick finished. “My record’s twelve seconds.”

“Mine’s ten,” Jason replied. It was fifteen, but no way in hell will he admit that.

“All right, anyway.” Dick coughed. Rubbed the back of neck. Folded his arms. “Explain.”

“It’s simple,” said Jason, “I think I just time-travelled my ass to the past.”

\---

Before Dick could say anything, Jason quickly spoke, “So now’s around the time where I travel the world, I think. And you haven’t heard about me coming back from the dead? Yep, thought so. Well, I did. The whole zombie thing, I mean. Don’t know how or why, but that happened. Here’s a quick crash course: Talia – Al Ghul, yeah, stop gaping – rescued me and dropped me into the Lazarus Pit – don’t ask – and I spent the better part of the year training myself. Was planning to kill Batman and the Joker, but that fell through – can’t have everything, am I right? Rounded off Roy Harper, _Arsenal_ , and Koriand’r, _Starfire_ , to be a sort-of-team, and called truce with the bats, at least until Batman fucked it up just a few days ago. I punched him and stole one of his Batmobile, and I think I was watching Tom & Jerry with Roy and Kory before I got whisked away to freaking Bludhaven in the year two thousand and late.”

“Did you just quote Fergie?”

Jason flipped him off.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is.... so... messy.... I think I wrote this when I'm slightly tipsy or something? Jason refers to the events of Death of the Family but that wasn't the last time he met Dick - it was when he punched him when Dick revealed that he's actually not dead and is working as a sexy spy. And "Batman fucked us up a few days ago" was supposed to be referring to Robin Rises (Batman taking Jason to Ethiopia) but Jason wasn't supposed to know about Dick being alive then... Also, why would Dick tie Jason up?? I don't KNOW, this is too... messy... I was gonna scrap this but I feel like this has potential, so... Here you go.
> 
> I'm thinking of making this a 3-part story: second chapter will be about Dick dragging Jason to Bruce & Alfred, and third one is just... closure.. I guess...? It's still a WIP, so pls bear with me lol.


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